So, this is a project I’ve wanted to do for a while, but I have a life and got behind on doing stupid shit to my cats.
Last night while sitting on my couch, probably watching Khloe and Lamar and eating potato salad, I suddenly remembered I wanted to bread my cats. Quigley is always hiding, and Browning is easy to fool if you promise him food, so Browning it was.
This cat is a complete dick to me always. He wakes me up in the middle of the night to cuddle because he’s too busy ignoring me when I get home from work. He hides under my bed and goes after my feet. He knocks my shit over all the time. He chews cords. He’s the reason I started this blog. Naturally, breading this asshole wasn’t going to be easy.
I was pretty proud of myself and texted Suzanne almost immediately. She replied with “Breading was so three months ago.” So, cats aren’t the only dicks.
After I was finished breading, I returned to the couch, probably to finish my potato salad. Browning immediately ran to his litter box, even though he took care of business five minutes before I breaded him, to punish me. He sat in his litter box for 10 minutes, forcing himself to go, and then didn’t even bother to cover it up. Dick.