Cats don’t let blinds obstruct their view.

This is Milo; he belongs to my friend Allison. While I don’t really want to feature other people’s dick cats on our blog, I don’t think this really counts since Allison and I are convinced that Milo and my cat Ernest are actually the same cat…he just travels between our houses using some magical portal I have yet to find….

Anyway, anyone who owns cats knows that they love to sit and stare stupidly out of windows. And anyone who owns a cat who is a dick (which are pretty much all cats except cats who are super old and/or cats who only have three legs) knows that dick cats hate the shit out of blinds. Milo is clearly a dick and will destroy anything that gets in the way of him staring stupidly out the window.



A little privacy, please: part two

On the slim chance that I think I’ve beaten these assholes into my bathroom alone, I discover that one of them has gone stealth and stowed itself away in anticipation of me coming in there. The funny thing is, what if I wanted to use my guest bathroom? Or, I had no plans to go in there until a few hours later? I’m sure these assholes have a plan b.

So what happens when one of them is in there, and the other isn’t is this shit:


And this shit:


And the entire thing becomes one huge, pretty annoying game that they play until I free the one that’s been locked inside.

Now if Browning is inside the bathroom, and Quigley is locked out, Quigley makes this god awful shriek and claws at the doorframe until I let him in.

There’s seriously no alone time with these assholes.